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Ever had one of these {A Mirror Pep Talk}? They regularly make appearances in a movie or two (the famed Home Alone scene may count as one…or at least I like to think so) Perhaps I’m behind the times in starting this, but I’ve been employing them lately and they seem to do a great bit of good, especially in times of doubt or fear.  Diametrically opposed to my sister, I have always been one who avoids the mirror.  My sister is by no means vain, but she does love to spend her free time trying new hairdo’s, makeup or outfits.  I on the other hand, only used the mirror as a place for  obsessing about being the ugly duckling, acne prone, or too lumpy bumpy in one spot or another.  So I decided that it was less than healthy to visit a mirror for my self esteem and sanity.  It generally went on this way for years.

And then something happened that changed my perspective on the mirror and what I SHOULD see there.  This last year has been a rough year for me — as I have made some significant but necessary life changes.  I find myself back in my hometown, living with family, and trying to find my feet again.  It feels like such a far cry from where I once was.  Tears come more easily, and challenges seem greater, but I am a phoenix and I will rise again.

The other day, I was corresponding with a friend that has been incredibly sweet to me throughout this bumpy journey.  Our exchange went something like this:

Friend:   Lovely, I always see you for you.
Me: And what is it that you see?
Friend: I see you of course.
Me: Sometimes I don’t know who she is.
Friend: You are beautiful and brave.

Anyone, unless they are Hannibal Lecter, calling someone “Lovely”  already lifts the spirits.  What they said was so kind and sweet that its effect did not leave me until long after our conversation (Heck that was almost two weeks ago and I am blogging about it now).

That evening, just before bed, I decided to go into the bathroom and look for that Brave and Beautiful girl that I have been missing for some time now.  I overlooked the wrinkles and blemishes that seem to make special unlimited starring roles on my face at times.  I searched the sea of my blue eyes that everyone gets lost in for the girl on the life raft and I decided to pull her out.  She deserves it.    And so, I began to give myself the pep talk that will change the life I deserve to live. Like you, I am product of a God that loves me and makes no mistakes.

Listen to that small still POSITIVE voice.  It will speak to you if you let it.   He has placed me on this road because He knows that I can handle it.  Though I weary and want to sit, He has plans that do not include long spells dedicated to sitting.  He has put in all of us the spark of greatness and bravery, we must simply have the fortitude to blow on it.  Sometimes, there will be others that will do it for us.  It is also possible  you won’t have that and you will need to fill your lungs and find your way.  Sometimes, parents don’t know how to love us and support us so they do a bit more damage than they mean to.  (See my entry on toxic people – I might know what I am talking about 🙂 ).

Sometimes, nothing seems to work, all of the walls seem to close, and the mountain of tasks is larger that you think you can mount.  And so, I go to into the bathroom and repeat the words of my friend,  “You are brave and beautiful”.  I stand there for a moment and try and think of some of the ways that I have been given the opportunity to be these things and the ways that I have succeeded. Some days, the list is longer than others.  I am fairly certain my friend never realized the tremendous impact that statement would have on my life, or that I would pass it on to you.

Through my blog, I hope to “pay it forward” to at least one of you — you are beautiful and brave {or handsome — whatever works for you}.  Go find a mirror and count the ways…